Bonjour readers! It’s your correspondent Jean coming almost live from Le Mans, where the 85th running of Le 24 Heures du Mans saw incroyable racing in the world’s most recognised and prestigious automotive event. The action was tres passionnante, not only up to the last cinq minutes of the race but even after, when we saw race officials boot out the third-placed Rebellion LMP2 Oreca 07-Gibson for illegal modifications which the team allegedly tried to hide after the race.
Talk about a glimpse of the future, this dismissal gave the Chinese Jackie Chan racing team the second two spots. Don’t forget we can claim an Australian connection to Jackie. Charles and Lee-Lee Chan moved from Hong Kong to Canberra as a cook and housekeeper at the US embassy when Jackie was seven. Jackie stayed on in Hong Kong to study drama and jumping in the air and kicking people. Jack did visit our national capital ten years later and lived with dad and mum in the servants’ quarters of the US chief of mission’s residence.
Of course, a Porker, but unfortunately a hybrid, won the whole show in Le Mans, not Canberra where they just put up with cars. In good news, the two Toyota hybrids didn’t finish because they were too unreliable and didn’t make enough noise. And the team was called Toyota Gazoo Racing. Is it named after The Great Gazoo — a character from The Flintstones — or is it a misspelling of Kazoo, an instrument for the musically challenged? It doesn’t matter; it’s a crook name and Toyota deserved to be done over by Jackie Chan who we, in the proud tradition of this country, can claim as one of our sons.
Anyway, the whole thing was the most exciting thing I’ve been to since the 1973 launch of the Leyland P76 and the 2017 Nude Solstice Swim. Think about this: the No 63 Corvette led its class for almost the whole 24 hours, till a brake lockup forced the canary yellow muscle machine across the gravel, giving it a shredded tyre. With three minutes to go the Aston Martin and Ford racing teams got past.
Now if you are thinking about going to Le Mans next year can I suggest two alternatives. My favourite is the Chateau de la Barre, home to the family of Count and Countess de Vanssay for more than 610 years. I usually take the package, which is normally about $5000 but in June jumps up to a multiple of that.
Basically, you take the TGV from Aéroport de Paris-Charles-de-Gaulle to Gare du Mans where your choice of French classic cars like a Jaguar E type or Austin Healey wait for you. Then you meander or hoon (as we say in Francais) along bucolic country roads, through picturesque villages and along the shady banks of the petit Loire river to the chateau. When you arrive, Guy and Marnie de Vanssay shout you a few Coopers bière pétillante, then move you up to your suite complete with flowers and port wine, designer fabrics and precious antiques. Later you can have a “grand siècle” candlelit dinner in the XVIIth century dining room with all the family silver and crystal.
At the other extreme is camping. Look, I thinking camping is fine but I don’t think it will ever catch on.
A better guide than me for sleeping on the ground with shared toilets and no Kérastase shampoo or conditioner is beermountain.com. For more than 25 years Beermountain have been guiding those Le Mans fans who realise that camping and socialising at the track is as important as the race itself. Their ratings for camping sites are expressed in beer bottles, with the maximum four bottles going to the Masion Blanche site next to the Porsche curves and the lowest going to the Garage Vert area.
Given the French government sees the Le Mans weekend as a revenue opportunity, Beermountain recommends you pack two breathalyser kits, satellite navigation to ensure you don’t exceed any speed limits and a vomit bag. Beermountain also dispense service and campaign medals ($20 each) to recognise contributions to the sport of Le Mans camping and drinking.
This is a shortened version of the original article – read the rest at The Australian
