Having butchered our attempt to complete this year's Shitbox Rally (a charity race across the outback in cars worth less than $1000), my buddies and I have decided to enter the similarly prestigious and gruelling inaugural 24 Hours of LeMons race this week.
The 24 Hours of LeMons is endurance racing for $1000 cars. It's not just an oxymoron; it's a breeding ground for morons. It's a similar event to that held in the French town every year except the cars in the Australian race can't cost more than $999 and we will be competing at the home of the Big Merino — Goulburn, NSW.
We asked Vern Schuppan, the legendary Aussie who won Le Mans in 1983, to be one of our drivers, but he declined, offering to kick in ten bucks towards our expenses instead.
Our team, without Schuppan, will be driving a BMW 318IS that cost us $250 and has orange rims. If we are successful it will be the German marque's first success at something sounding like Le Mans in 16 years.