Thank god (or whoever you worship, for me it's Peter Brock) for Rocket Rod Sims, ACCC head honcho and one of the only friends in high places we car owners have.

At lunch on Thursday, Rod told me and 300 other suits eating, what purportedly was chicken, in a room at the Four Seasons, where there was clearly only one season, burning hot season and where no self-respecting battery hen would have sat for more than a minute because of the risk of becoming KFC, not to drive our cars home if they have Alpha airbags. "They are incredibly dangerous" Rod said in his typical, understated way.

Rod says his gang at the ACCC believes that Takata Alpha airbags have a manufacturing flaw, as they were not produced according to design standards and do not deploy as intended. "These airbags pose the most severe risk of misdeployment and (with) metal fragments and shrapnel propelling out of the airbag and into vehicle occupants causing serious injuries or deaths." But apart from that, Rod, what's the problem?

There are 50,000 cars loose on Australian roads right now with Alpha airbags. Rod reckons they pose immediate danger and require urgent replacement.

Look readers, friends and others, there is nothing to worry about unless you drive a 2001 to 2003 BMW 3 series, a 2001 to 2003 Honda Accord, CRV, Civic, Jazz, MDX, a 2002 to 2006 Mazda RX-8 (crikey, I've been racing one of those!), a 2000 to 2004 Nissan Pulsar, Y61 Patrol, D22 Navara, T30 X-Trail, A33 Maxima, 2000 to 2004 Toyota Corolla, Avensis Verso, Lexus SC430 and the 2002 to 2003 Rav. Best go to Rod's website https://www.productsafety.gov.au/news/takata-airbag-recalls-affecting-australian-consumers to see how close to death you are.

In what should be music to our ears Rod also said he was keeping after auto retailers and manufacturers. He said that the industry doesn't get that it not only has to meet warranty claims but it is governed by Australian consumer law. Roddie didn't mince his words again, basically saying if your new car is a lemon (the model has systemic faults but the dealers says things like "oh, we haven't seen this before" as Mazda dealers do) then the dealer will have to give you a new car or a full refund. And in more good news for manufacturers Rod said the ACCC would make sure they shared technical information with independent repair shops. Keeping data to themselves means you have to take your car to an authorised dealer where you can pay more and often get inferior work.

In better news there's no dangerous airbags in the JD Power 2018 list of the most dependable cars. Now in its 29th year, the dependability study examines problems experienced during the past 12 months by original owners of three-year-old vehicles. The most dependable vehicle in America is the 2015 Porker 911! Ah Dr Ferdy, you've done it again. Top of the lists by category are the 2015 Audi Q3, all the 2015 Lexus models, the 2015 Kia Rio and the Honda Odyssey.

Talking of Porkers, it turns out Michael McMichael wasn't the only one at the Berlin International Motor Vehicle Exhibition in September 1899. Reader and Fairfield Motor Cycle Club junior scrambles champion Erwin Zehentner was not only there but a close friend of Ferdy Porsche.

"(Your column was) a very good take on Ferdinand's early work, as he was not a doctor of anything then, but an electrical engineer working for General Electric. His all-electric car had a range shorter than the distance to his mother-in-law, and he had to resort to recharging the chariot overnight, which meant that young Ferdy had to sleep in a strange bed, and, as you probably know, this can be a problem. He therefore ripped some of the batteries out, substituting them with two De-Dion engines, which recharged the batteries and conveniently extended the range. We therefore not only have Ferdinand building a battery car, but a true all-wheel drive, then a hybrid. And now they are telling us the new hybrids are innovative and brand new!" Erwin says.

Many of you have been kind (or nosy) enough to ask how Tom and I went at last Sunday's Wakefield 300. Winning is not everything in life which is fortunate because after starting 25th (last) on the grid we came 14th — which was only five spots (but a lot more laps) behind the other father-son team of Craig and Adam Burgess in the Bright Printing Group Ginetta G50. Winners of the 300 were the Brindabella Bathroom and Renovation team of Trevan and John Spiteri in their Mitsubishi EVO. Just mention The Weekend Australian Racing Team when you ring John for a big discount on your next French provincial bathroom.

And today's photo is there because of the boat not the car. Launched this week in Miami, the 15.5 metre Marauder AMG is a joint venture of Cigarette Racing and Merc AMG. All you need to know is under the bonnet are two of Mercury Racing's nine-litre, dual overhead cam, four-valve, twin-turbocharged V8 engines turning out 1155kw each. The Merc green machine is good for 220kw and a snip at $1.8m.