Right now too much news is barely enough to fit in between Terry, Johnny and Gottie. And talking about what's making news, I was right. Bringing back the biff has seen the ratings for F1 soar and be adopted all through the field. This is what Curling needs to do to get it onto Fox Sports.
Brad Pitt and Hamo are teaming up for a movie produced by Top Gun and Gone in Sixty Seconds helmer Jerry Bruckheimer. Road & Track has elected Jenson Button as the best living F1 racer to have a drink with, but Australia only gets one qualifier (Alan Jones) on the 19-person list. Come on Danny Ricciardo, you can do better.
But, of course, the biggest global motor racing, political and zoological event of the year was last weekend's Bathurst 1000. How good are the Supercar execs at promotion? They are absolutely magnificent. The fact that there were people beaming in from all over the world and what they saw is Australia open – we're double-vaxxed, people are back, they're in their trailers, they're together again.
Yes, they had the current PM severely squeezed into a Mustang with Skaifey running around the best piece of road on the planet. Then they arranged for the current PM to be caught up in a Covid-19 scare to squeeze even more juice out of the ScoMo lemon.
Then the millions around the world saw (in no particular order) a random echidna stop the race; an Albino wallaby or kangaroo; a goanna; an old tennis court; the best pitlane entry in the history of motorsport (foreign entrant Shane van Gisbergen) and, to attract the large global baby-boomer audience, the only Supercar driver with a Senior's Card, the enforcer himself, Whyalla's own Russell Ingall.
Apart from Rusty the Enforcer (45 years in the sport, won more international events than the old bloke has had Coopers on tap and still super competitive) the other stars had to be race winners Chaz Mostert and Lee Holdsworth and near race winners van Gisbergen and Garth Tander.
Today's shareholders and directors are QMS and TGI chair and ex-Swimming Australia boss Barclay Nettlefold, Henslow's CEO Justin Lewis and fellow worker Stephen Macaw. All live at Brighton, which is what passes for an affluent beachside suburb in Melbourne.