The intoxicating Alfaholics GTA-R might just make me an Alfa male after all

Remember how it felt when you discovered there was no Santa Claus, Easter Bunny and the government allowed electric cars on our streets? Today's going to be one of those days. I've found an Alfa I want to buy.

Yes, I know I've mercilessly stuck it to Alfa owners like still regular reader Pete Matthews, with bon mots like: "I just saw an Alfa Romeo driver using his indicators correctly on the freeway. Twice. Should I report the vehicle as stolen?", or "What is an Alfa Romeo owner's most ardent wish? Answer: 'A bigger …' Well, you know the rest."

But wait! It's also the 100th anniversary of Nick Romeo changing the name from Anonima Lombarda Fabbrica Automobili (Alfa) to Alfa Romeo (no ego there, Nico!). Apart from naming the company after himself, Nico had another stroke of genius hiring a young up and coming racer named Enzo Ferrari. Like Nico, Enzo named his company after himself. In fact, Enzo liked Alfas so much he became a dealer and invented the now well known phrase used by car service people around the world: "Non l'abbiamo mai visto prima" (we have never seen that before).

How did we get here? Oh, I was going to tell you about the Banks family and their Alfaholics GTA-R290. The original 1965 Alfa GTA could put out 85KW and became a very successful racer. "The trouble is," Jeremy Clarkson wrote in The Times last week, "Alfa Romeo has spent most of the recent past making dismal hatchbacks with the word 'Fiat' crossed out and 'Alfa Romeo' written in crayon. So, we have all forgotten that back in the days before the Arna and the 33 and the MiTo, Alfa was one of the most respected and loved car companies on earth."

Dad Richard and sons Andrew and Max spend 3000 hours creating a 178KW, 830kg, carbon fibre, little red supercar. The price? Ex-factory from Bristol about $580k for what Top Gear's Chris Harris calls: "The most enjoyable car I've ever driven."

Wondering about classic car values during this time of contagious respiratory and vascular disease that will lead to a five-year boom that will make the roaring twenties look like a temperance society meeting?

The HAGI index of classic car values is showing that while Feezer prices are up 7.9 per cent for the year to date, Porkers outperformed everything in October, up 3.32 per cent. Classic cars have outperformed the S&P Global 1200, the EuroStoxx 50 and have jumped 300 per cent in the past 12 years.